Saturday, November 01, 2008

A Public Service Announcement. Sort of...

While letting my sexy Hussy sisters carry the load here (and yes, guilt lays heavy on my shoulders), I have been keeping an eye on world news. So when I ran across an interesting article this morning, I figured it was the perfect topic to toss out here!!

It's about the inventive ways nations are developing to encourage their citizens to use condoms!! The Bill and Melinda Gates foundation kicked things off (making sure to understand guys don't get "microSOFT" while wearing a condom?)...the foundation sponsored the development of a ringtone that sings "Condom, condom" on Indian cell phones. Apparently in India, the attitude is that only prostitutes should wear them, but if your cell phone reminds you, it's hip, smooth, up to date and okay. (With the added benefit that you're announcing your protection to your potential object of lust, I guess.)

Ethiopians, who are on record as hating the smell of latex, now have a real perker-upper...coffee flavored condoms. These dark brown sheaths allegedly taste and smell like that Ethiopian favorite - the macchiato. (Please. No jokes about CREAM).

Australians decided to battle HIV infection by using trees. In western Australia, it seems that potential sex mates hang out beneath trees, meeting and picking out their partners. So nurses from local clinics have taken to hanging cans full of condoms on the lower branches. On average, 3000 disappear each month. (I know there's a joke in here somewhere, but I can't find it. Something about seeing the "Wood" for the trees? Er...you're creative. Insert your own joke here!!)

Argentina took the harsher route, creating a commercial with the tag line "Be Careful". It shows two skeletons in a sexual position. Talk about jumping a girl's bones....

And the Germans? Well, God bless these creative little devils. They've come up with a "Spray on" condom for those who are...um... hard to fit. (I'm sorry. This is a topic that just screams for humor. I'm fighting it.) While this invention sounds like the perfect solution, it also has it's drawbacks. Application occurs when men slide their penises into an applicator can, shaped like a phallus. The latex coats them from inside the can. Quote..."It FRIGHTENED many men during the testing phase..."Unquote. Application is accompanied by a loud hissing and the final result takes about three minutes to dry, also not appealing to potential users.

So remember, girls. We may complain about pills, IUD's and so on, but those poor guys don't always have it any easier.

They taste and smell like coffee, pick protection from a rubber tree, overcome their fear of turning into a skeleton, spray chemicals on their cocks and make sure they get a phone call so they can let you know they're protected.

Suddenly, the whole make-up and hair thing doesn't sound quite so bad, does it???

Here's wishing everyone a great November,
Cheers,
Sahara

(And if you want to read the entire article on these things, you can read it at CNN.com under "Living".)

1 comment:

Ciana Stone said...

LMAO - I'm a firm believer in safe sex but damn, people sure go to extremes in an attempt to make a rubber not a rubber.

Thanks for the heads up (no pun intended)!!