Wednesday, July 16, 2008

You want me to talk about what?

That's what I said when Ci said I needed to skedaddle on over here and post something "man-like." Dang woman didn't tell me ya'll were talking about condoms.

First thing off the top of the head. Ugh.

Second thing. Ugh.

Third. I don't really like those things. Yep, I know it's a safety thing. But that old saying about it's like taking a shower in a raincoat. It's true..

And these new-fangled things shaped in spirals and like dolphins? No thank you, ma'am. If I gotta wear one then it's at least going to conform to me. Besides, like all men I figure I got a shape that's built to please so don't go screwing it up with extra latex.

I don't have anything else to say. I wouldn't have said this except Ci threatened to hop a plane and fix me where I wouldn't ever need one of these things again. That woman scares me. (Could have something to do with that beer bottle she broke on my head way back when. Still got the scar to remember it by.) I know female empowerment is a good thing and I'm all for it. Take me, baby. But don't threaten to turn me from a rooster to a chicken.

And don't ask me to wear the Home Run rubber. I figure I can hit a solid double with a standard.

Have a good week. (And I like the way the blog looks. Anyone want to introduce me to whoever the gal is in the photo?)

Chase Hawks


Nicole Austin said...

LOL! She scares me sometimes too. You're very smart to follow her wishes...or is that command. Whatever.

Its wonderful to hear an honest male opinion on the subject. You need to stop by and comment more often. Umm, do I need to have Ci make that an order? *g*

Ciana Stone said...

I scare people???? Okay, yeah, I sorta scare myself first thing in the morning. Brush my teeth with my eyes closed because d a y u m.

And thanks Chase for so generously posting - without cohersion and NOT under duress and all that:)