Thursday, March 06, 2008

Gettin' Naughty - Taking Control

Have you ever taken a dominant role in the bedroom? Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking about taking things to extremes or becoming a FemDom. There's no need to run out and buy a vinyl cat suit, whips or floggers--unless you want to.

What I'm talking about is once in a while taking control in the bedroom and letting your man enjoy. You know how wonderful it is to let him be in charge and not worry about anything but reaching that prized precipice. Well, don't you think he'd enjoy the luxury of once in a while being able to just relax and let you run the show. Shake off those common misconceptions that men want sex more and should be responsible for everything in the bedroom.

Consider how you feel when he gets all caveman and primal once in a while. Doesn't it make you feel sexy and desirable when he acts commanding? Well, turn the tables on him. Get aggressive and see how he responds. Most likely, he's going to love it if you let your carnal side show and let him feel your intense longing for him.

Why not become the lover he's dreamed of? It's not that complicated to do, and he will love every second, which will result in high returns on your investment!

You don't have to try and be something you're not or take things to the extreme and get all tied up in knots, literally. Find something you can do which will have him looking at you as if you are filet mignon on Superbowl Sunday and is team is winning, whether it be sinful lingerie, performing a seductive strip tease or dressing in costume for some role-play fun. You know what gets him hot--now use it!

Be bold and initiate sex then tell him you want to focus on his pleasure and needs. As long as he's not one of those totally dominant alphas, he's going to love the idea. What man wouldn't love having his partner focused on his pleasures?

Men love women who are not afraid to try new things and experiment. Sit down and consider the books you've read and things you might be willing to try. Give him a chance to express what he'd like to try too. Get out of the same old rut and allow yourself to be erotic. If you just can't get your body into that crazy contortionist position, don't be embarrassed, laugh about it and try something else. Your willingness to experiment will rev up his desire.

Remember that it's about him so don't focus on finding your own release. If you're not up to the more aggressive approach, that's okay. Work up to it nice and slow. Perhaps start by giving him a massage or a bit of pampering. If you've been with him for some time, you should know what he likes. Rub him down with some massage oil or use your lips to get those nerve endings buzzing. Compliment his assets such as his butt, which so nicely fills out his jeans or whatever it is about him that turns you on.

Relationships take work and in the bedroom is not the place to just sit back and not do your share of keeping the lust stoked. Drag him off to bed, show him your baser, less civilized side. Let him see and feel your desire for him and the rewards will be a boost in your love life.

So Naughty it's Scandalous!


Nicholas said...

Speaking as a man..... Yes please!

Nicole Austin said...

Thanks, Nicholas! Its always good to get a man's take on things.

N.J.Walters said...

Excellent, and fun, advice, Nic!

Rachel.C said...

I thought I was in charge!?!?
Mmmm.... Maybe not.
Hubby's back from one of his trips so I might have to take some of your advice Nic.

Lover of Books said...

your advice is good. I'll have to think about it and start slowly. :)

Ashlyn Chase said...

I'm the aggressor in the bedroom 95% of the time. I still feel plenty sexy. It seems to work for both of us even without floggers. Okay so there have been blindfolds, silk scarves and various toys.

But, even though I'm usually the one who suggests it, I'd love a little seduction.

TK Winters said...

I like taking charge and giving him all my attention. It seems to do as much for me as it does for him ... and later, I certainly reap reward after reward after reward.

Great topic, sis!

Nicole Austin said...

Have fun, Rachel!

Its always good to have a switch in roles Ashlyn so you can just relax and enjoy.

You go, sis!

Sally Painter said...

You are the Naughty Queen of the World! I bow to your greatness!

Anonymous said...

I disagee, I think ALL women should have a vinyl catsuit in their closet ;)